Monthly Archives: January 2014

ch-ch-changes

New blog name. New blog host (finally made the switch to wordpress after using blogger exclusively for almost a decade). New ME.

Just kidding about the last part. I’m the same me. I’ve just decided to put a little more effort into my blog.

See, a year ago I was a stay-at-home writer, working on my fifth (unpublished because I keep chickening out from querying agents) YA novel. Now I’m a stay-at-home mom slash novelist-on-hiatus. And I love it. I love, love, LOVE getting to stay at home with Kiernan. I mean, look at this face — who WOULDN’T love to hang out with this cutie all day long?

Kiernan 38 weeks

But I miss writing. A lot. And I happen to love blogging. Quite a bit. And I’m not quite mentally ready to get back to my novel. So here I am. Trying to figure out wordpress — but already excited by the differences from blogger (I love changing up my style and blogging is no different). It may be slow going for a bit while I try to get it down, but I’m here — doing something for myself. In-between baby naps. 🙂

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The Godzilla of all beds is *finally* going down.

While I was pregnant lots of stuff got all out of whack. My body. My emotions. My ability to remember things. Aaaand, the topic of today’s post: my (furniture) decision making skills. They became disastrous.

I decided that bigger was better.

I decided to buy a huge crib for the nursery, when a smaller one would have been so. much. more fitting for the tiny room.

I decided I hated our bed frame. (Which, looking back, is just like whaaaa? It was a perfectly fine dark wood shutter headboard & frame from Crate & Barrel.) I gave it to my mom for her guest room. Because:

At the time, the chicks that were renting our condo broke their lease, claiming that someone had stolen the money they’d put aside for rent (first of all, yeah freaking right), and left their furniture for us in a small way of compensation. It wasn’t all awful. We scored an awesome high dining table and chairs out of it. And a couch that is decent — and definitely better than the behemoth thing we had before. (Which Nelson loved, so shhhh about that last remark.) But we also took two bed frames. And I honestly have NO idea what I was thinking. They are uuuuuugly ducklings — but ones that’ll never turn into swans. For me, anyway. Maybe when we donate them someone else will love them.

One frame is all black with a leatherette, crystal-lined headboard. Ew. Just no. I didn’t even like it really when we took it, but for some stupid reason I thought it’d be better than the dinky metal frame we had in the guest room. Nope.

Then there’s this beast. The four poster frame we replaced our old (way better) frame with. It’s monstrous. I mean, look:

(Ignore the rest of the room please. There is much work needed! More on that in a near-future post…)

Hello. We have a low bedroom ceiling. This big-ass mofo does not work here at all. But I honestly wouldn’t like it even if we had a super high ceiling. It’s just not my style at all. (The picture doesn’t do justice to the ornate carvings at the tops of the posts or the carved seashell thing at the top of the headboard. Which I’ve hated more and more with each passing day.)

Finally, finally, finally, Nelson agreed to let us (me) shop for a new bed frame. And I think I found the one I want. (For now at least. Because, you know, I haven’t made the best furniture decisions recently.)

I knew I wanted something upholstered. I went with an ivory linen headboard because my dressers are dark brown and the walls are tan and I wanted lighter something to brighten the room. And for bedding I’m going with all white. There’s something so relaxing-feeling about an all white bed, I think! Not that I’ve shied away from color in the past, or that I will in the future, but all-white feels like it will be what I want. I ordered a new comforter + cover and new shams in white and ivory. I can’t wait for it all to arrive.

And, and, and? I invested in art for the first time! Like, actual art by an artist. Not some mass-manufactured generic crap you can get at Target or wherever. (Though I do own some of that as well, not gonna lie.) (And these are prints of originals, so I’m sure other people have them, too.) But still, look how pretty:

New Spring, Caroline Wright

A set of abstract prints to go above the bed. I’m in loooooove with them. I love how vivid the colors are, and I think they will place nicely against the rest of the room’s tone. I’ll post again when everything’s in place.

Things I learned in the first five months of being a mama…

Note: I wrote this and saved it in drafts three months ago, at the 5-month Kiernan mark. I know I wanted to add to it, but time got away from me and I can’t remember what, so I’m posting it as is!

I have a LOT of catching up to do, and I hope to do it soon so I don’t forget all of the details of the last few months since baby K arrived! (They’ve seriously been the most amazing and challenging and SPECIAL months of my life.) But until then, here are some things I wish I’d known (or listened to) ahead of time:

  • Swaddling is the best thing in the world. Miracle blankets and truewombs saved my sanity. 
  • Swings are the best things in the world, too.
  • Same with rock n plays.
  • Also? All of those things suck to transition out of. So now I have a love/hate relationship with them. But at the times leading up to right now? I might not have survived without them.
  • Just because something is toted as the BEST thing on the market (cough-mamarooswing-cough) doesn’t mean it will be the BEST thing in your baby’s eyes. 
  • It really does get better. Baby K had colic and there were (many, many, many) moments when, regardless of what I’d read or been told about things getting better, I just couldn’t see it ever happening. I couldn’t help her to feel better because there is no real definitive cause for colic, and it broke my heart and my spirit. I think it almost broke me all together. But K got better. It happened slowly and sometimes in a two-steps-forward-one-step-back pattern, but day by day, things improved. This doesn’t just apply to colic. It’s the same with getting sleep. There were days I thought I’d never get more than two hours at a time again. But now that I’m much better rested, I barely remember the panic that caused.
  • Breastfeeding can suck. But it’s so worth it. For me. After the trials we’ve gone through, I will never ever ever judge another mama for whatever she chooses to do in the great BF vs Formula decision. But for now, we’re 4.5 months in and K is exclusively nursing, for which I am really, really proud of myself. 
  • There truly is no way to explain the human capacity for love until you’ve had a child. What I feel for K takes my breath away on a daily basis. 
  • Husbands are pretty freaking handy to have around. For diaper changes. And building swings. And moving around nursery and playroom furniture. And cooking meals. And just general support when the world seems like a teeny, tiny, no-air-to-breathe-because-you-will-never-get-through-having-a-colicky-baby place. And did I mention diaper changes? For the first few days of K’s life, I was so overwhelmed with the trauma of breastfeeding, N didn’t make me change a diaper even once. I will be forever grateful.

What do three holes in the ground say to each other?

Well, well, well… It’s been a long time since I’ve posted.

I’d like to dust this little bloggity blog off and start posting again, but we’ll see. Time is short these days because I now have A BABY TO TAKE CARE OF!!

Yep. Baby K is here. She arrived 9 days early (just like I did, so long ago) and has been completely rocking my world ever since. Without getting too sappy (well, actually, this is my blog and I’ll be as sappy as I damn well please) let me just say, I’ve never felt more complete as a human being than I have in the months since my daughter came into my life. My journey into motherhood has also been one of constant self-discovery. Maybe because the thing I want most in life is to be a good mother — and in order to do that, I have to truly understand myself. What I think. What I believe. What I feel. Because how can I make the best decisions possible for my daughter if I don’t know those things?

I have quite a bit to say — and the topics are all over the place — so my new goal is to get everything down one way or another (and mostly here on the blog). Lots of retroactive stuff, too, because we’ve gone from this:

The most nervous moment of my life

which, 17.5 hours later, led to this:

The craziest, coolest moment of my life

which, 8 months later, led to this:

The most recent picture I have, taken last night — checking out The Hungry Caterpillar after bath time and before bed.

So, there’s a whoooooole lot of stuff that’s been going on and already some of it is starting to slip away. I have a memory book for Kiernan where I plan to handwrite a lot of this, but it’s going to take forever so maybe if I record it here first, I won’t forget as much.

Plus, yanno, recipes and deep thoughts and anecdotes and home improvement and all that stuff.

For now, however, Kiernan’s taking a nap and I need to scarf down some lunch before she wakes up.